Lesson # 5 We All Bleed Red

I start to wonder if I have any right to speak on Eric's story. Is it right for me to talk about someone else's story?  I mean, shouldn't Eric do the talking?   This is his story; this happened to him, after all.  But a gentle answer from the  Holy Spirit reassures me there is room for my words on the subject.

The Spirit reminded me of the greatest story ever told- Jesus Christ crucified; our salvation through Christ's death payment.  Whose story was that? It was Jesus' story.  But truly, his mother, Mary, had a story of her own.  And if she were here today, I sure would want to hear her side of things!  Probably because it would match up so closely with my feelings, thoughts, and concerns.  Although we do not have any record of Mary speaking about the crucifixion and all that led up to it and all that followed, I am convinced she had an audience, all the same.  Her best friends wanted to know, right?  Her neighbors had curiosity, not?  How did she deal with all of it?  What went through her mind?  She knew a broken heart. She endured what no mom ought to endure.  She was helpless to help her son.  She had a story, too.

Which leads me to the lesson learned- we all bleed red.  We all have wounds.  We all have scars. We all get lost.  We all cry tears. We all get stabbed by cruel words and unfair judgments.  We all fall down. We all lose faith. We all wonder why.  We all have doubts. We all bleed red.

I don't care how immaculate Mary was- she was a mom and she was a human being and she had to have wondered why, cried, sank into the depths, lost her bearings, wished it were not so, and hurt so deep she could scarcely breathe....

And we would listen to her story!  It would never grow old or lose its salt.  I am sure of it.  For the very power of Almighty God is upon it.  It is story of His living, breathing grace-- which is new every morning!

So, I will get that speaking gig started.  As unsure as I am about every aspect of it.  The reason my story is worth telling is because the power of Almighty God is in it.  It is His story- it is about His living, breathing grace.  That never gets old.

Hawaii showed me that people are kind. Wherever we go, goodness and mercy follow us. (Psalm 23) Hurricane Hilo awakened in me the realization that we are all on this rugged journey of life, working to figure it out.  We all need a Savior.  We all have one, if we receive Him.  And we all get cut...and we all bleed red.  

Lesson # 4 A Time to Laugh

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance. - Ecclesiastes 3:1,4

What's so funny?

The funny thing is, Rat Lungworm Meningitis at its worst, had Eric wondering if he would ever want to laugh again.  It hurt him to consider the idea.  Much like you wonder if you will ever want to eat again when you are crouched over a bucket retching with the stomach flu. 

 To laugh when Eric was in such deep agony would have been bad timing.  I did not even want to put the TV on, for fear some comedy would taunt Eric in his misery.  His nerve hypersensitivity was so extreme at one point on this journey that a pineapple tidbit falling onto his lap while I fed him would send him writhing.  He did not cry, as that would have caused additional nerve pain.  Instead, he winced. He would holler out and then close his eyes and barely breathe.  I could see tears roll out the sides of his closed lids.  If timing is everything, that was NOT the time to laugh.

But right before Eric ended up in ICU, God gave me the gift of laughter.  If you asked me what time it was in Hawaii, I'd a had to say, "It's a time to weep"  For everything there is a season, and that was a season of tears.  Yet, just before things took a turn for the worst, God prescribed the best medicine- laughter.

Eric was beginning to hallucinate.  Sort of. It was not due to high fevers, but most likely to the parasites swimming precariously close to brain matter.  They stayed this side of the meninges- the outer lining of the brain (where they dog-gone died after about 7 weeks of swim fun)- but there is never room in a person's brain for worms, right?!  I recorded the following episode.  Eric told me upon waking on the morning of November 27th, that he had talked to Joe.  I was quite surprised for a number of reasons.  One, I was with Eric almost all waking hours and two, Joe never calls anyone. So I say, "Really?, When?" And Eric continues, "Well, not just now, but I was talking to him and he was watching The Lion King and I asked Joe who was the voice of the Lion and Joe said he didn't know.  I told him to guess but Joe couldn't guess.  Then I told him it was my voice.  Not really my voice, but my voice.  It is hard to explain.....oh crap! What am I talking about?  I hate this! I make no sense. Whatever...."

 It was funny, sort of, but not funny, really.  Not at that moment.  What was happening to Eric's mind to send him into a strange sort of land where Joe Reinert makes phone calls?  Later, when that nonsense talk resurfaced, I ought to have been a crazy mom-- hysterical with fear.  But God's grace walked through the door and changed things.  

 A radiologist, David, at the hospital contracted Rat Lungworm.  He was out of work for nearly a year.  He had recently returned.  He stepped into the room and proceeded to share with me his episodes of nonsense.  He said he was out of it for most of the seven weeks he was in the hospital and he cannot really remember much pain, but he does have vivid memories of believing he was in a strange hospital that turned into a homeless shelter.  The man next to him was taking out David's IV.  He kept assuring David it was OK.  David remembers wondering what happened to the doctors and nurses?  Was this really how things had to be in America?  It was that real to him.  

 But the part of David's story - the part that God used as medicine for my fearful heart - was when David mentioned the cats.  He said every time someone came to visit him, many cats followed.  They always got in the door.  Even when David asked people to be sure to not let the cats in.  They would sit on his lap.  He would ask his visitors to please take the cats away.  The worst part of the cats in the homeless shelter hospital was the shape of their heads.  David said they were square-headed cats.  1950's flat-top cats.  Creepy.  

 This all was a relief.  A way to laugh at the danger.  A way to face the fear and say, "Ha!, You can't scare me!" And a way to reconcile Eric's condition with hope of recovery.  Eric talked about wanting to eat his supper- sitting on a tray right in front of him.  But he couldn't.  There was all that dirt in the way.  And he had to dig it up.  And yet he kept telling me he wanted to eat.  I kept telling him to go ahead and eat.  I would help.  He just argued.  And like a light switch, he turned off the crazy talk.  And ate.  

If you are in a season of weeping, I pray God offers up a prescription of hope: Laughter- the best medicine.  In a small dose, perhaps.  Since, maybe things are still not at all funny.  But may you find something about your situation to laugh at. May God send you the healing touch of humor. 

And on a final note, when Eric visits, the glorious music of his laughter fills the air.  What a joyful noise!

Lesson # 3 God Promises an Abundant Life!

Just to make it clear from the start- before lessons accumulate and someone credits the wrong source.  These are not my lessons.  I am not teaching or preaching anything from my capacity.  I'm empty.  If I were full of lessons to teach from "me", I'd be full of it, all right.

No.  This series of lessons is simply things I learned.  My lessons from God.  I share what I have learned with you because His wisdom is for everyone.  He can teach through me.  He can do anything He wants with this blog.  I learned a lot from His mighty hand.  And I am recording the lessons on paper lest I forget.

So a lesson from Hurricane Hilo- Lesson # 3 in my blog- is to make perfectly clear who gets the credit.  Jesus is the Teacher, Author, and final Authority.  These are His lessons.  Nurse Veronica's words continue to ring in my ears:  "Remember Who is in control here, not you!  God is in control!"

If your day seems 'out of control', perhaps you've forgotten Who's in charge.  It's good for me to reflect on His character:

• Jesus is the author and perfecter of our faith (Hebrews 12:2) ~ He writes my story.
• God is the beginning and the end; the All-Powerful (Revelation 1:8) ~His is the last say.
• Jesus is the bread of life (John 6:35) ~What am I hungry for?
• He is the Good Shepherd (John 10:14) ~A most trustworthy guide.
• The Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6)~ Ah, to rub shoulders with that kind of peace!

John 10:10 says the enemy has come to steal, and kill, and destroy.  

Steal our peace of mind. Steal a good night's sleep.  Steal our joy.  Kill our dreams.  Kill all hope. Kill our enthusiasm.  Destroy relationships.  Destroy life, itself.  

John 10:10 goes on to say, "But I (Jesus is talking) came that you may have LIFE and have it in abundance!  Have it to the full. Till it overflows!"

Abundant peace. Abundant rest.  Abundant joy.  Dreams-come-true. Hope eternal. Abundant energy and enthusiasm, and good relationships.  Abundant LIFE.

I learned some of these things from childhood.  But some lessons don't stick the first time around.  Hurricane Hilo left an imprint on my soul.  Every "abundance" I could imagine (and beyond my imagination) poured upon my family during and after this storm.  

As hard as "this" is for you right now, (whatever this is) grab hold of the truth of John 10:10.  He comes into your life to bring an overflow of goodness through this.  Even this.  

Lesson # 2 Grow Where You are Planted

But those that are planted on the good soil are ones who hear the word and accept it and bear fruit, thirty fold and sixty fold, even a hundredfold. -Mark 4:20

God planted people to be growing in our path long before we ever knew we would need them.  For example, God planted Tony seventy-five years before I would need him to be on the same plane, in the same Honolulu airport, heading in the same direction as me.  Tony is a retired military man who has traveled the world.  But God planted this good man in good soil (Tony loves the Lord) and in due season, Tony was right where God needed him to be.  And Tony was able to bear much fruit, as his spirit was kind and his heart was soft.  In other words, Tony noticed me.  Had he been self-centered and cold-hearted, he would not have cared about my distress. He may have ignored it.  Most likely he would not have seen it.

God planted Kim to be along for the journey to Kansas. She drove. She had a kind spirit and a soft heart to take me to Kansas City International. I did not know Kim two years ago.  

God planted Mary and Nathan at the organic farm in Pahoa. Eric needed kind men to bother to return him to the ER after the first trip resulted in being sent home with antibiotics.  Those boys saved Eric's life. I have no doubt.  Eric languishing in pain was too afraid to drink water because that meant an excruciating trip to the bathroom. Rat Lungworm Meningitis may not have killed Eric directly, but dehydration and organ failure could have.  Meningitis is a swelling of the lining of the brain.  Those parasites were literally eating the sugar from Eric's spinal fluid.  It was the good ship, Lollipop; a free trip to the candy shop. Those critters traveled until they were trapped in the meninges of Eric's brain, where they died.  

It is a scenario that is hard for a mom to think about, let alone write on paper.  But the truth is, Marty and Nathan could have sided with the farmer who thought western medicine was of little use to Eric. They could have used the available excuses that made it hard to get to Hilo: one car to share with all the workers, an hour's drive, we've already taken him once and were sent back home, there was work to be done, why not give the antibiotics more time, why not let Eric sleep it off.   I am so glad those boys had kind spirits and soft hearts.  They heard Eric's plea.  They saved his life.

God planted Sharon, Graham, and David (Rat Lungworm survivors) to be willing and able to walk into Eric's room for "show and tell". They showed us they beat the Rat.  They told us the hope of medicine, time, therapy, and faith.  When you are in the midst of a great storm it is nearly impossible to imagine calm. God planted these people, allowed them to contract RLW, and through that experience they grew to be compassionate, willing, partners in His grace.

God planted Russell, Veronica, John, Martin, Robert and many other highly competent medical professionals at Hilo Medical Center to care for Eric and to hold me up.  I call them pillars.  When you have a hard time walking in the wind, it is good to have pillars lining your path.  You can lean on them, stop and rest, and gain some composure to continue on.

God planted Sally D, Sally J, Jan, and Alice as pillars at the Kansas writers' conference. "May I pray with you?" on their name tags translated to me, "I have God on the phone, what do you need?"

God planted Dr. Martell.  You see Dr. Martell is a Rat Lungworm expert because, as he said, someone has to be!  No one knows much about this awful disease that Dr. M refers to as a "train wreck".  Hard to treat something you know nothing about.  Dr. M was in Europe for two months.  He got back to Hilo in late October.  He doesn't work in the ER, but he caught sight of Eric's train wreck and ordered the experimental, yet best-option, treatment.  This gave Eric a three week jump-start.  Those parasites did not register on any test until spinal tap number three.  Dr. Martell was growing in the right place at the right time on November 10, 2011.

God planted Puna Covenant Church and Christ Lutheran Church with loving members.  Eric's name made their prayer lists.  Members stopped in to pray.  They brought cookies and socks, sandwiches and love.  Barbara knew how to knit so well that she could pray 16,000 stitches into socks for me. When did God plant that seed?  She baked my three favorite kinds of Christmas cookies.  I didn't tell her.  God did.

God planted good seeds back home, as well.  Entire classrooms rallied around Eric's wellness campaign.  Mr. Becker's third graders sent the sweetest cards.  Ms. Albitz's art class sent wallpaper of hope. Mr. McDonald got the wrestling team to send encouraging words.  Danice, Denise, and Rose worked together to send a blizzard of love.  Hundreds of you bothered to sign a snowflake.  

I could go on.  And on.   The point is, those who grow where they are planted- with a soft heart toward God- bear much fruit!   It might take seventy-five years for one of the branches to produce, but when it does, look out!  And grab a bushel basket.

The thing is, no one looks at their every-day circumstances and thinks they are doing mighty deeds. All I can do is to try to convince you, those every-day deeds are so important their value cannot be measured by earthly standards.  The tiniest of kindnesses made all the difference in the world to us.  Be open, be aware, be kind-spirited, and be softhearted.  You will bear much fruit!

Lesson # 1 God is a very present help in trouble

Psalm 46:1 says, “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in times of trouble. 

God is our shelter.  Our refuge.  Our safe-haven. He is a “place” to go to where we can breathe a sigh of relief.  Breathe.  Not anxiously await the other shoe to drop.

And where did that saying come from?  Waiting for the other shoe to drop.  I have said it and I have felt the anxiety of it. 

It seems from a little research that it dates back to the days when wooden buildings had thin ceilings and you could hear nearly everything that happened upstairs.  When someone took off a show and dropped it on the floor, it made a clunk that might startle someone, especially at night.  If you were trying to sleep, you had to wait for the other shoe to drop to feel comfortable drifting back to sleep.    It has come to mean waiting for what comes next, if it seems inevitable. 

More bad news. Inevitable. Anxiety!  It is just a matter of “when”.  What a terrible way to live!

But when you have had a huge storm hit, I must say that human nature can lead to such thoughts.  I maybe never said it out load, but my mind whispered to my heart, When do you think the other shoe will drop?  If this could happen, what else will happen?

No wonder Jesus spoke so sternly about worry.  No wonder he got demanding in the face of fear.  Do not be afraid! Do not worry, Do not be discouraged!  No wonder he kept it simple… Be courageous! Take heart!, Peace, be still. 

God spoke directly to me through Russell the radiologist.  He looked me in the eye and said, “You are here for a reason.  You are here for a reason. God has a plan here. He is with you!” 

And sweet and gentle nurse Veronica switched on her mom voice and put on her sergeant face and said, “Don’t you forget who is in charge here.  Not you!  God is in control!” 

Both Russell and Veronica spoke to me as one speaks to a child who is beginning to show signs of panic.  They allowed God to speak through them. And God was not mincing words.  He said through them:  I am your shelter.  I am your strength.  I am your help in this trouble. In this present trouble- I am here. Now!  Got it?  

Got it!

He was a very real help.  Practical as the day is long.  We sometimes get the idea that God is all harps and cloud fluff.  Or we get the feeling that He is so far “out there” that He could not possibly care about our insignificant troubles.  But when they are your troubles, they are not insignificant!  And He says He knows the number of hairs on our head!  If something were insignificant, I would think hair counting would be right up at the top of the list.  But Jesus talked about it in the Bible.  He also mentions sparrows.  And lilies.  So perhaps if flowers and birds are that important, my life matters, too.

In Hawaii and back home, all through our ‘time of trouble’, God was in the details.  

He gave me a house.  Pedar and Lona opened up their home to me.  Lona just strolls up to third floor from her second floor post as a surgical nurse and offers a room in her house.  Every night I breathed a sigh of relief as I entered that shelter. My safe-haven.  My refuge.  Every morning a thermos of coffee greeted me.  God – a very present help in times of trouble!

He gave me a car.  The rental car was costing me hundreds of dollars a week.  And I barely drove 2 miles a day.  Norman walks into intensive care and asks if I could use a car.  He has one he stores for a couple of snowbirds.  They won’t be arriving to Hawaii until January.  And Norman doesn’t just drop off a car, he gives me a first-class tour of the town and all the ocean beaches I might like to return to if I have some time.  Details.  Small stuff, like directions to the ocean. 

He fed me. Sandwiches from Trish and Becky.  Lunch dates with Sharon. Lunch voucher from Theresa. Meals back home. More meals back home.  And Joanie organizing all that.

He clothed me.  Tony, who gave me a ride from Hilo International to Hilo Medical, returned to give me a ride to Wal-Mart.  Tony thought I might need some clothes and perhaps a toothbrush…and some other shoes besides clogs.  Barbara knitted me a pair of prayer socks.  16,000 stitches of prayer.  I wear them whenever I feel the need to have extra-sound footing.  And Kaitlyn and her mom crocheted Eric and me prayer shawls. There is nothing quite like wrapping yourself in a shawl that a whole McFarland Wisconsin church congregation prayed over. 

He sent money.  You cannot get more practical than a dollar bill.  God provided our family with abundant financial assistance.  Dave paid for Joe and Lily’s school lunches for the month of November.  My family (both sides) pooled money to send Bean on an airplane over Thanksgiving to be with Eric and me.  Sandy and Randy gave all their frequent flier miles to us for a first class trip home. Pedar and Lona dropped off some travel money.  Linda P and a slew of people pooled their resources and bought my children Christmas presents.  Jerry and Maxine made sure that my kids got some additional spending money. Michelle paid my traffic ticket in time for me not to lose my license!  And that is just scraping the surface.  Dozens of people donated to the trust fund.  Many anonymously.  Runners ran. Givers gave. Cookers cooked. Prayers prayed. Visitors visited. Cleaners cleaned. And Doers did. (you know who you are!)

I would have forgotten some of those details. Like my kids back home need lunch money- forgot!  My traffic ticket is due- forgot!  We will need a handicapped bathroom-and we don’t have one…oops, how will that work?  God responded the same as always, “I’ve got that covered”

And He used the good people around us- He used whoever would respond with a loving heart.  He did that for us.  He WILL DO THAT FOR YOU!  Just ask!

Lessons Learned from Hurricane Hilo.

I learned so much during what I dubbed the "Hawaii Ordeal” Thinking it might be creative to call it "Hurricane Hilo", as it was a storm and it was a big one.  And it was in Hilo.  Lessons learned from Hurricane Hilo.  

What I plan to do is number the lessons, starting with Lesson #1.  They won't be prioritized for significance.  I won't put them in chronological order.  I simply want to number them to keep track of how many lessons I learned and then to - one day- take all those lessons and begin to assemble the book I intend to write.  

I hope there are a few readers out there who will hold me accountable.  Those who might nudge me if too much time lapses between posts.  "Hey, haven't seen anything new on your blog for awhile!"  Readers who might post some comments to encourage me and challenge me.  Always good to have challenges.  Perhaps you will challenge a point I make or relate your own take on a lesson learned.  I have a lot to learn, even from the lessons learned!

So, today marks the beginning of Lessons Learned from Hurricane Hilo.  I will start my numbering in my next post.  I plan to post regularly.  For sure 4 times a week.  You can't write a book unless you write, you know.  Not sure that any followers will read that often, but you can stop by and pick up where you left off.  The path will be marked clearly with numbered lessons.  

We all have storms.  Life blindsides us.  Sometimes we get warning of a storm brewing.  Sometimes they hit us so unexpectedly that we lie in amazement- how did we end up on the floor?  What was that that just hit?  Sometimes, God sends us into a storm with intention.  Sometimes we end up amid a storm that was partly our making.  Sometimes this fallen world shows it's imperfections and we end up innocent victims of the ravages of the brokenness of this life.  

No matter how we find ourselves in a storm, there is One who is with us IN the storm.  A teacher, a guide, a protector, a counselor, a king, and, best of all, a Savior!   For those who believe in the saving name of Jesus Christ, the worst that can happen to us in a storm is that we are sent Home.  Home with a capital H.  Eternal life means life never ends.  It changes, yes.  But it goes on...